Assailed by a tragic death and legal woes, Hilaria Baldwin is back in the news. The tragedy and legal trouble pertain to her famous husband, actor Alec Baldwin, but Hilaria has been running interference with the paparazzi, reprising her role as a supportive and exotic wife of Spanish extraction. In case you didn’t know, Hilaria, otherwise known by the uninteresting name of Hillary Thomas, is not Spanish. Not in the least.
Of course, if one is living life well, one probably hasn’t the foggiest idea who Hilaria Baldwin is. Kudos to you! But, we promise, investigation of this matter is culturally illuminating. Read on, if you dare.
Raised in Boston under the auspices of upper-middle-class comfort, Hillary became Hilaria to woo her husband and con the world with her bizarre Spanish story. Recent footage of Hilaria asking reporters to leave her army of small children alone—a reasonable request, to be sure—shows that Hilaria continues to employ, if inconsistently, an unmistakable Spanish accent. An odd choice for a native English speaker.
As pundits note, questions abound. Having been outed for her pretend Spanish accent, why does she persist? Is it a nervous tic that irrepressibly arises in the presence of cameras after years of rehearsed speaking? Do people remember she is fake? With the wave of new media coverage, how many people will once again be fooled into thinking Hilary Thomas is a Spaniard worthy of the Hola! Magazine cover?
Hilaria’s accent saga and identity con is not the reason people dislike her. No, arguably, the real reason people hate Hilaria is because she is thin, rich, and a mother to many. The seemingly endless cycle of glowing pregnancies and dewy lingerie photoshoots with newborn babies (Hilaria in the lingerie, not the babies), is a stick in the eye for a culture that envies natural virtue.
What is more interesting about Hilaria than her Academy-award-level acting performance over these many years is her consistency. In the end, maybe these are the same. As we have previously considered, an important part of Hilaria’s brand is her lengthy catalog of strange workout videos on Instagram. Filmed in media res—on the living room floor, in front of the bathroom mirror, in the corner of a bedroom—the videos demonstrate rapid-fire, repetitive, body-weighted exercises. For the vast majority of mothers, clad perpetually in athleisure, performing these brief workouts could occur at any moment. For people wearing normal clothes, it might be a bit more challenging, but, this author can attest, it is still feasible.
For mothers of kids of a certain age with demands on their time, dedicated time at the gym or even specific workout times are not a high priority. But mothers stand to gain much by developing strength. So much of caring for babies and young toddlers involves bending, squatting, lifting, and carrying. All quite physically demanding movements. And that’s just to get to the grocery store and back! Hilaria’s workouts, and it’s only fair we call her by her stage name “Hilaria,” are a great fit for surreptitious strength-building. Whether Hilary the actress spends additional hours weight-training at the gym or performing over-the-top yoga routines is anyone’s guess, but you can, as most people who make a sincere try will discover, build physical fitness into daily life with the bouncy little routines Hilaria demonstrates.
You can rail against the bizarre posing and the unlikable qualities of such a grifter, but her workouts really do work. We cannot recommend many of the personal qualities of Hillary, but the performer Hilaria offers attainable inspiration for mothers who want to feel stronger. You don’t need extravagant wealth or loads of time. A few minutes here and there with kids around can provide all you need for a brief strength-building regime. The only equipment required is your body. The only necessity is that infuriating principle: consistency.
