A Catholic Take on the Declining Birth Rate

In the realm of doing things that make you uncomfortable, we can add live radio to the list. I had the pleasure of talking with Joe McClane on his show A Catholic Take last week. It was a delight! I didn’t answer any of the questions as intended and said “definitely” about 12 times in as many minutes, but there’s no thrill quite like trying something new.

I’ve been a guest on live radio before (demanding of the hosts if they really wanted their children to grow up to be characters on Seinfeld…that also didn’t go as intended). However, in that instance, I did not have the option to listen back. Listening to yourself is, rather than solely an exercise in vanity and narcissism, a critical exercise in review to try to improve what you are new to doing.

The topic of discussion on McClane’s show was my recent piece on Americans who say the ideal family size is three or more children in a culture that is witnessing the birth rate plummet toward less than two. Mr. McClane seemed skeptical, but from what I have observed, this sentiment is borne out in conversations with people across the political spectrum. Well, I suppose we can rule out the purity-obsessed eco-terrorists who argue that it is morally wrong to welcome children into the world. But beyond that, there is deep ambivalence behind the decision to have few or no children.

While I’m no researcher, journalist, or otherwise qualified commentator; I am someone with time and attention available. If you spend time around the home with small children, you run into neighbors, spend time chatting at parks, get to know the retirees down the street, and generally have the bandwidth to think about what people think about their lifestyle choices. There is, despite outward appearance, an acute longing in many people to welcome that unparalleled gift of new life, to expand their family’s capacity for loving care. But there is a default assumption that this is unrealistic.

Statistics often fail to capture human experience. After all, they are merely numbers, and when it comes to individual people we are known by names and our thoughts encompass so much more than factoids and numerals.

As I attempted to articulate in my discussion with Mr. McClane, ours is a culture afflicted with loneliness so profound we no longer recognize the meaning of our longing. A world with fewer children is one of loss. The solution, being open to more children, is neither simple nor easy. But it is worthwhile.